Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
