Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
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