I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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