I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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