we have pet lesbian snakes
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
