he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
