he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Did I show you my penis last night?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
