We're facebook friends in real life
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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