His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
