you thought your balls were fighting each other...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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