I think scott just propositioned me for sex
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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