yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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