There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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