Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
