Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
