you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
wow bdsm is so cute
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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