It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
