Do vagina's smell?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
