he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
