I wish I could punch you in the face.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
This is the prime rib incident all over again
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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