Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
