I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
