its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize