so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
We were destined to go to rehab together
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
