great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
