butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
