Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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