I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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