I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
