Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
