are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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