All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
