I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
