Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
