Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
