What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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