found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Dicks are not precious.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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