No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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