I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize
