I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I will pee on everything he values.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize