I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
