As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm both gender and math confused
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
