It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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