Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
well I can't set my house on fire every night
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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