at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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