I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
