she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
