the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
