His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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