i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
do nipples grow back?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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